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a Buddhist walks up to a hot dog vendor and says "make me one with everything"

Hans Van Harken @AlmightyHans

31, Male

Joined on 8/6/04

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AlmightyHans's News

Posted by AlmightyHans - December 8th, 2010

Doodlibop did an amazing job with helping us flesh out the theme for Ace Pilot. A Game being made by myself Justin Pruitt and a handful of great fellows. Unfortunately she decided to pull out of the project due to creative differences.


This opens the door for anyone who was previously interested. As stated previousely We're going for a James Bond: Goldfinger style. Thankfully now I have a Doodlibop's take on the theme song to better help convey what we're going for with this song.

in this version, we don't have any instrumental bits that Chris (oney) is going to be adding. listen to the song to get a feel for what we're going. The meoldy is up for adjusting but this is pretty close to the final thing:

The Ace Pilot Theme Song

We really hope we find a new voice that will fit soon, we aim to finish this by next month... ish.

also, if you're interested go ahead and record your take on it's it's alright if it's rough and have various version of certain parts of the song. but rather than linking us to your previous work, we'd like to hear your take on this specific song.

here are the lyrics:

Ace, a master Pilot.
You know well how things tick.

Space, vast and silent.
His playground, his home his schtick.

You pull in the opposite sex,
And like gravity collision occurs.

All a part of your unsettling hex.
With your charm, our vision blurs.

You hold your mass, make us feel like we matter.
We orbit, you leave, then our particles scatter...

(more angry this time)
Ace, a master Pilot!
You twist and turn our hearts!

Space, vast and silent!
You cower in the darkest parts!

Desperately you drag us in,
Into nothing, a lightless void.

Carelessly, you crush us within,
Leaving us absolutely destroyed.

You hold your mass, make us feel like we matter.
We orbit, you leave, then our particles scatter...

Ace... Come back to us!

(lyrics by: Hans Van Harken and Justin Pruitt)


Posted by AlmightyHans - November 25th, 2010

I made a short entry on how to make a weak punch look more strong in a live action video. It's not a reliable trick but is good to know so you can save a bad fake punch in a movie or make some sort of impact more intense.

I know the video is laggy in this and you can't quite see the difference, but the idea is for you to try it yourself, if you follow the instructions it should work.

check it out!

also, i made this one video when i was 17 where i figured out how to do it and stupidly made a retarded video, but a couple of these are good examples of this trick.

lookie here.

Posted by AlmightyHans - November 21st, 2010

In the process of figuring out Justin.tv I realized Live stream is better in many ways. The interface is more practical and manageable and there's better compatibility with my webcam. The downside however is that Live stream, unlike Justin.tv isn't capable of filming using my iphone thing.

I linked both channels to my twitter account, that way you can actually watch them them regardless if i'm using justin or Livestream to broadcast our stuff. finally my twitter account will have some sort of use. my twitter is HaVaHa

YES we're gonna give is a go at a first episode tonight! If you care to join you're more than welcome. We strongly encourage interaction. Expect to see us bouncing around from tutorials to reviews to just interaction. we're gonna test grounds for the first episode so bare with us.

we'll be using livestream tonight for sure, so go here to our account if you're interested. We plan on starting at around 8:30pm-9:00. we're in San Francisco so thats Pacific Time.

spread the word! we're curious to get your feedback on how it goes and interact with all you jerks.

Posted by AlmightyHans - November 21st, 2010

So me and two college friends Andy and Jenny are working on a couple projects. I discovered Junstin.tv and thought maybe it'd be cool to have live shows of us.

The channel would consist of some flash tutorials, film tips, the 3 stages of production and movie reviews. just general stuff related to the 'entertaining arts'. we're still setting up the channel but you're more than welcome to tag along. we'll be posting updates and letting you guys know when we're going to start.

in the mean time, you can see what the channel is looking like so far:


caution: it looks really gay.

Posted by AlmightyHans - November 4th, 2010

just dropping off the message that Doodlibop is going to be the singer and casting is complete. Thank you all who showed interest and sent me a private massage (pm). Although you might have not gotten this gig, I would really appreciate to keep in contact for future female voice related projects.

Posted by AlmightyHans - October 28th, 2010

Ace Pilot is coming up. And we are in search for a female vocalist to sing the main theme for the character driven game. Obviously i can't put down the lyrics here, we want to keep this project pretty under wraps. But the theme will have this sort of tone. And if you are or know a girl with a powerful singing voice, let us/her know and we will be willing to offer a price.

For any further questions, pm me.

Cpt. Hans signing out.

also check this and thisout.

Posted by AlmightyHans - October 11th, 2010

Hey so i saw this konami e3 press conference. it was shamelessly bad. But i thought the gay jap had a funny voice so i edited this video drunk, one night. Now my friends and i have all these inside jokes with this guy. check it.

/* */

Posted by AlmightyHans - August 26th, 2010

So i just came back from a 12 day trip from Mexico visiting family and doing some big business.

first off, I realized just how bad of a state Mexico is in. These new Zetas are fucking scary (google it), and i hope for the best for my brother and family who live there. There's basically a civil war going on. The Government is trying to get rid of the narcs and these new terrorists (Zetas) are trying to take over the narcs. Fucked up.

But my god was this an eventful trip. Good and Bad. I swam with wild dolphins in the middle of the sea. Had heart to heart I'd never had at the level I did with family, heard a 45 second machine gun grenade fight not even a mile away, got stopped by one of the many military posts for inspection on the highway, befriended an american Vietnam Veteran who is closer to being a pirate than human being who taught me how to "rip someone's eyes out", a friend was bitten by a boa constrictor in the toe, another friend's girlfriend became Ms. Universe, and countless of other crazy shit.

But above all, one of the main reasons I went to Mexico, was because about a month ago, some investors were interested in financing a feature film and for the first time in my life I had to talk to a room full of 5 business guys and convince them that their money was in good hands to invest in my first feature film.

Luckily, I convinced them. Not only did I convince them but I gave them such confidence that they told me they don't even want to be involved in the decision making for the project! But that they'd be there to help in anything I ask them.

This is BIG news, in the next two years I'm going to be writing, story boarding, casting and doing everything there is to do in Pre Production to film the movie.

I'm going to keep the details under wraps, because it's still at a very early stage. But it is such an exciting moment in my life. and will dedicate a big part of these 2 years to making a genuinely polished piece of good entertainment.

Anyway, I'm out.

Posted by AlmightyHans - July 30th, 2010

Comic con was pretty awesome. I took a bunch of pictures and made a couple albums on facebook. if you're my friend, go check it out now. if not... too bad. But boy was it a good con this year. the air conditioner was actually working and surprisingly it didn't feel that crowded. I think they had a better badge system this year, so people couldn't sneak in so easy. That or the Recession is really hitting loads of people badly.

I also stayed a couple days with some old friends who live outside the city. They showed me around SD, so it was the first time i went around town when it wasn't comic con. I have tot say, it's a pretty nice place.

I was sad to realize how this years comic con lacked the Bandalin/Partridge charm, but aside that it was really nice. I met Tommy Wiseau again, actually held a pretty short conversation with him and co-star Greg Sestero. Apparently Gregg lives pretty close to where i do. I also ran into Eli Roth, a man I really admire. He's pretty chill, he was with his date, walking down the streets of SD one night. Me and Krinkles were chatting up a storm outside while some friends were buying booze, and out of the corner of my eye I saw Eli. I had to tell Krinkels to hold that thought, because some friends of mine have an obscure inside joke about Eli Roth, and they never would have believed me that i saw him without picture proof. It was funny.

Right after i got his pictures, i impulsively said "You're the world's best jew, man". he responded modestly "I dunno about that..." and walked off.

I probably impressed his date, so yeah... I assume he got laid.

Oh yeah, Adam Phillips came to comic con this year, it was great meeting him. He was definitely not what i expected. In reality he's a cool, grounded guy. I guess i expected some sort of autistic savant who over analyses water particles and stares at things in tunnel-vision concentration... nah i didn't expect that. Point is, he's really cool.

And newgrounds user "Donut" made an absolutely amazing tankmen suit that he wore for a day at the Booth. which was totally fucking awesome. Props Donut!

oh and i found out tom is double jointed.

Posted by AlmightyHans - July 16th, 2010

So I'll be attending comic con this year in the end. I'm pretty excited to meet up with the peeps and hang out once again in san diego.... yeah....

i guess that's it. who else is going?